1. Alex's first time at daycare. She is having difficulty adjusting, which I expected. She is a shy child to begin with, so I knew it would be difficult. I just didn't understand how hard it would be on me to see her having so much trouble :( It really is just like a weight on my chest, in my heart. She cries at drop-off and then cries off and on during the day. I hate knowing that. The only thing that is keeping me going is that she does have fun at times and does a lot of stuff (sock puppets, coloring, painting, story time, circle time, playtime on the play ground). I know it's good for her to be socializing and having her own relationships. I just hate this adjustment period. I *hate* that I can't make everything "right" in her world instantly. It's frustrating because I don't know if this is a "normal"/healthy adjustment period, or if it should be going easier? We've decided to give it to the end of the month before we reevaluate the situation. I don't want to pull her out if this is a normal transition period because there is so much there that will be good for her. I feel powerless though. And I just carry that stress around.
2. Trauma response back at work. We lost two little kids over the summer-both unexpected and heart breaking situations. I've been doing a lot of grief/trauma counseling of both the staff and the students. It takes its toll, emotionally.
3. I called my fertility center. Supposed to be good news, right? Well, not so much :( I was told last year, at my consultation, that I could call anytime that I wanted to come back (since I had my consultation and HSG). The nurse practitioner assured me that I didn't need to come back within a certain amount of time. I even emailed her to make sure last spring. We are definitely ready to go back now: we saved money for an extended maternity leave, I got extra time off by saving up my sick days. We are so much more ready than we were last year at my consultation. Anyway, to make a long story short, that nurse is no longer working at the center and they informed me that because I have not been back in a year, we need to do ANOTHER consultation. And while that's not a problem, they are booking out new consultations in December! :( :( I explained my situation to them (how I am a previous patient, what the former nurse said, etc) and they were very nice. Told me that they would certainly put me on a cancellation list, but the earliest that could do was December. I'm just so disappointed. And after the week I've had, I would have liked some good news-something imminent to look forward to.
So that is my tale of woe. Please pray/send good vibes/keep your fingers crossed for Alex. That's my biggest worry right now...that she adjust quickly and be happy.