Friday, August 24, 2012

Mind F$ck

12dpo today, or 7dp5dt. Dh just got home from a four day business trip late the previous night. I went into the bathroom this morning to "freshen up" before Well, I peed on a stick, not really expecting anything. I mean, I used it and then just kind of tossed the test onto the bathroom counter. Well, when I deigned to look at it, to my great surprise, there was a teeny tiny line. That kind of killed the mood. Just sayin'. Can you imagine how distractible I was after that?

But anyway. It was there. I didn't have to squint. I didn't have to hold it up to the light. I didn't have to take my magnifying glass out, didn't have to dismantle the test (I've seen so many women do this...but I just don't get why????). The best part??? Dan could see it too! I wasn't imagining this line. I wasn't conjuring it up. Because, believe me, that's happened before. It's amazing the things you can see on a blank pregnancy test.

It is definitely a pink line too. Not an evap. Came up within a minute or so...well within the time limit.

But it's super light. Like really really light. There probably has never been such a light line. I can't even get a good picture of it with my camera--although my cell phone did catch a decent pic of it. However, I do not know how to upload cell phone pics onto this blog.

So is this a mind fuck or what? Am I pregnant? Am I not? Will it be a chemical? Now the waiting begins. I had just come to terms with being "out of the game". So yeah, wasn't expecting this. I hope I'm not getting all jacked up for nothing.

Honestly, I don't have the greatest feeling about this, as my line with Alex appeared two days earlier and was darker....but every pregnancy is different. It also doesn't help that I know the quality of this embryo....

Anyway, I've been carrying the silly test around for like the last two hours. Studying it, holding it at different angles. Obsessing. Scouring the internet. And it comes down to the same thing: It's there, but light. No other information can be gleaned from this. I've gotta give this one up to the universe for now.

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